Facebook Post turned blog....

**Started out as a Facebook post, but it got a life of its own and outgrew the narrow confines of Facebook, so pasted it here. I miss Myspace and the blog-type atmosphere it used to have. Facebook has become twitter pro, just little tidbits, but no real meat.**

Since the day I moved out of my parents, in fact until the last few years, money has always been in short supply. Many times I wasn't sure where I was sleeping that night, or where I would be when the sun rose....or as was often the case...set. But somehow in my life I manged to only have to live in my car for two nights. I never went hungry, I always had clean clothes, and I always had what I needed, if not always what I wanted. Once Rais was born, I always had a home. It may have changed, but I always always had a place that was mine. Most of my good fortune goes back to the fact that no matter what, I always had a job. Maybe it was McDonald's, and maybe it changed from week to week, but I always worked. I have been on unemployment twice, both times I quit when I found a job that paid more than the unemployment. And the only reason I even bothered with it was that I wanted to find a "better" job, not just another job. I'm not dissing unemployment, just saying I always made sure I had what I needed to get by. Once I had a family, I always made sure I had enough to provide for them as well and make sure if we didn't always have what we wanted, we had what we needed. And a little of what we wanted, when we could.

 I look around me now, and I have stuff, I have niceish things. It might not always be new, or pretty, but it works. I buy my xbox games 2 years late, when they are under $10, I shop for my clothes at Wal-mart, and if I own a big ticket item (like cars), I didn't by it new, and I didn't pay but about a fraction of what it cost when whoever owned it first bought it. But yet I can't complain, I wouldn't have it any other way. I had lived the life of not knowing, and I wouldn't have traded it for the world, but once I had others to take care of, that was not longer an option. In all things, I endeavored to make sure there was a roof over our heads, food on our table, heat, water, clean clothes, and little worry that these things would go away. In fact, somehow I always equated stable with everything being ok, I guess in my own way it was showing love. Not that it translated well that way, no one has ever understood how I show love it seems, but meh.... it is what it is. And I am who I am.

And now with no one here, no one to provide for, no one to take care of... I'm kinda lost. At the end of a workday, I could say "That sucked, but I'm doing it for a great reason. I have those at home depending on me." Now when I try to tell myself that it rings hollow in my ears. First among all the things that bring me joy, make me feel like I matter, and are important to me, is to be a provider for (and supporter of) those I love. Not just financial support, but emotional and everyday life support as well. I'm lost without that.

Now, I'm not going to go back to my old ways, I have two amazing sons who I'm sure don't want to live in daddies car when they come to visit, but I can't help but feel lack of purpose now... Maybe I should get a cat....or 3..... LOL Seems I have written a novel here, and it went astray, I was just musing and rambled a bit. Times like this I miss old Myspace, I enjoyed writing down my thoughts and sharing them. You never know how something will ring true with another. Back in those days, every post was a novel, and many of the users were writers and poets at heart. You don't see that anymore. Twitter, Facebook, and text messages have taught us that life can be summarized in small little tidbits of thought. So constricting, so limiting, so small. It's amazing sometimes how as we've all grown more connected, we also become more distanced. We all want to see and touch the lives of others, but just for a sentence or two. Welcome to the new world I guess. I'll cliff note on Facebook some, but as for my real life, I guess it will have to live here. If it lives anywhere at all. 

Wow, ramble on wayward son! 

Random Journey's With Autism : Logan's Obsession

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Random Journey's With Autism : Logan's Obsession: One of the signs of classic autism is spinning of wheels on toy cars. Logan has always done this and we never realized it was a sign until w...

Random Journey's With Autism : We start our Journey...

We recently discovered our youngest is Autistic, me and my wife had started a blog we are both authors of to talk about journey.

Random Journey's With Autism : We start our Journey...: Like a growing number of people these days we started to notice that something might not be exactly right with our son's development. He r...

Random Tech Ramblings: 100% CPU usage XBMC in Windows XP and others.

Child blog post, click on the link so see the full post!

Random Tech Ramblings: 100% CPU usage XBMC in Windows XP and others.: So I recently decided to turn my old desktop, that we didn’t use since the wireless didn’t work anymore, into a HTPC (Home Theater PC). ...

A newbie motorcycle buying/riding guide!

Child Blog Post, click below to View the Blog!!!!!

Random Motorcycle Ramblings: A newbie motorcycle buying/riding guide!: I have ridden motorcycles since I was five years old. I would not call myself an expert, but I ride well and have ridden a large number of d...

Trying out Live Essentials Writer

Just trying this out to see how it works! Live Essentials Writer is a tool you can use to write blogs, and it’s free if you have a valid installation of windows.

 It seems I can post a picture and have my text be beside it. It took a little work, I had to click on the picture and then in the paragraph section of the ribbon click on the “align text left” then it allowed me to type to the right of the picture. When I first inserted the image I couldn’t type beside it, only under it or on top of it!

 

Ok, I take that back, when you first insert a picture there is a a format ribbon that opens at the top and allows you to change the layout of the photo’s and text. I hadn’t noticed it the first time I inserted an image. I’m not sure what options change depending on what service you use, I use blogger.  When you click on a picture a new option opens up along the top,  “Picture Tools” and under that a “Menu” called FORMAT. That takes you to a pretty good amount of picture options.

 

Something that is currently annoying me is the fact that it keeps reverting back to a much smaller font whenever I add new stuff. So I have to change it back to the font I want. Not a huge deal since I’m just changing the size and not the font itself, but if I was using a custom font it could prove to be somewhat annoying.

 

Lets see how adding a video works.

Baby Logan can’t Stop Laughing!

This seems to have worked pretty well, you get a special inserting and formatting ribbon for video’s. It’s somewhat more limited then the picture one, but it’s still pretty good. Blogger itself my have these features also, but so far it seems Live Essentials Writer does make things easier to do, and offers a more precise way to put together your blog.  Lets see about adding multiple images!

 

That worked pretty well, I even added a tilt to each just for fun. It

Does seem kind of cramped putting two pictures on the same row. However this is something my wife does on a regular bases, and something I don’t do very often at all. She has her blog set a little wider then I do. But I don’t think I would have any great problems making pictures fit 3 across. Another thing that is kind of nice is the ability to add a watermark to the picture when you put it on the blog, at least if you upload it from your own computer!

 

Now lets see what this picture gallery option does!

Test Album VIEW SLIDE SHOW DOWNLOAD ALL

Well, I have to admit it’s pretty darn awesome! This is one of about 6 layouts you can choose from, the they all are pretty neat! This alone is worth the cost of admission!! Course since this is free software that’s not saying much!! LOL I’m thinking at least for myself I’ll be user Live Essentials Writer for my future blogs!

Random Family Ramblings: Logan and the Terminix Commercial... he can't stop...

Click to go to the blog!


Random Family Ramblings: Logan and the Terminix Commercial... he can't stop...

Movie Night Thoughts: Blade Runner

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Bobbie Petrino Media Circus..... really?

I've been trying to figure out lately when the nightly news, news papers, and general main stream news became The Jerry Springer/Nancy Grace shows???? I understand, you have to feed the people what they want, if you don't give them that then you can't keep your job, or have a channel. I just don't understand at what point the public stopped wanting the steak and potatoes of what's going on in the world, and instead just wanted to be fed the fluff and dribble.

I can understand the head coach of a major university team having a motorcycle crash is at least worth a mention on the news. But that's not what we got, we got 5 minutes about the crash, then 15 minutes about motorcycle safety. Never mind the dozens of other motorcycle crashes there have been, just lately, but oh my gosh coach has a wreck, so let's spend the whole news cast on it now.


I don't even care about the "inappropriate relationship", or that he lied to the media about having a girl on the bike with him. I don't give a crap about anyone who lies to the media, heck, I encourage it, the way the media is anymore. He didn't lie to the police, that would be a problem. He didn't lie under oath, like a certain president did. So he didn't tell people he had been having an affair, so what, the only people who's business that is would be his, hers, and his wife's. So he didn't tell his bosses, I wouldn't either. In fact, the only thing I can tell he really did wrong is leaving the scene of an accident.

Now, I'm not saying it shouldn't have been mentioned, maybe deserving 2 minutes if that. On the other hand, if the university didn't look into it, covered it up, or had not acted in the universities, and the states, best interest, then THAT would be news. So if Jeff Long has said he's looking into it, and it seems he is doing so, that should be the end of it till he makes a decision. Now if it seems that decision is against general public opinion, and that the university is allowing a sexual relationship in violation of the university HR polices, then THAT is news.

In fact, as far as the Petrino issue goes, that's the ONLY thing, aside leaving the scene of an accident, he may have done worthy of the news. I don't think personal affairs (no pun intended) are worthy of the news. I understand there is a conduct clause in his contract, but that's between him and his bosses. But if he violated University HR policy, or if she got her current job because of his influence, that's another story. It's still up to the University to decide if he did violated their policies. If it seems he did, and they don't enforce the normal process for situations like this, then THAT is also news worthy. However, if it turns out he didn't violate any policies, or if he did, that he gets the same repercussions as others that have done the same thing, then it's not worthy of anything more then a mention in passing.


I'm somewhat on the fence about the conduct clause, really that's up to his bosses. But they will use public opinion to decide if they will use it to remove Petrino or not. And maybe precedence? I would like to know how they have reacted to others with similar contract in the same situation. That would be news worthy. If this has never happened before for someone with this clause, then I would say they have to follow public opinion. Since it's a public university. If it was a private school, that would be another matter.